The World of Haruhi Suzumiya
by ThisName'sExtremelyOffensive
Summary: A quiet day in the SOS Brigade clubroom is interrupted by the appearance of a hidden letter addressed to Kyon... well it IS Kyon, but not... well, you'll see. Sexual scenes (But not immediately), OC x Various Chars, somewhat multi-POV. My first story! Go easy on me, guys.
1. Kyon

**A/N: So this here is a thing. Yes a thing, it is patented and copyrighted (no it's not) to stop the first line of the whatever this is below this thing from going over to the left of the page because of the chapter select.**

**EDIT: I'd like to point out that this is a Romance/Adventure/Humour. Well, it kinda fits, doesn't it. :x  
Just think of it like the Hokey Cokey! Knees bend, arms stretch, R.A.H, R.A.H, R.A.H.**

* * *

_The SOS Brigade. Haruhi Suzumiya. Aliens. Time-Travelling. Espers. John Smith._

_To wind up in such a situation is folly._

_To get out of it sane, is another matter entirely._

* * *

**KYON**

A quiet day in the clubroom. Thankfully, Koizumi didn't start a game with me (but he's still smiling) and Haruhi wasn't in today. Perhaps the someone or something out there orchestrating my constant experience of terror decided to give me a break and let me have a peaceful day. If this is the case then whoever or whatever you are, you have no idea how grateful I am.

"Would you like some more tea, Kyon?" chirped the ever-lively voice of Miss Asahina from right next to me. I of course graciously accepted her offer and proceeded to calmly sip on the tea from the cup she handed to me.

I glanced over at Nagato in the corner, who was reading as always. I wonder if she is just reading, or using some kind of inter-thing way of hiding her observational techniques... After all, if she reads every day, how can she observe Haruhi? Well, whatever. As long as she's alright, that's what matters.

I was about to start a conversation with Koizumi (No, I don't know why I would do that) when suddenly her eyes picked up something. I looked over to where she was looking, a spot between the whiteboard and the door, but there was nothing there. I decided to ask the obvious question. I of course, asked Nagato what was wrong and suddenly everyone was looking at her, while she stared into same spot for a while.

After a few seconds she talked. "The object in that space appears to not come within the human visual spectrum.

"So," I quickly responded, "are you saying we can't see it?"

"That is precise." So much for my peaceful afternoon. Now it's all gone, thanks to whatever this is that Nagato will unveil.

"So what is this object, may I ask?" Koizumi just threw those words into the conversation. In response to this, Nagato went over to the spot she was looking at and picked up a small object just about as thick as a sheet of paper from the ground. She gave it a flick, like a budget magician, then it was revealed to us all; it was an envelope with a small but fancy seal on the back.

"It is addressed to John Smith." She simply said. The three of us gasped. _John Smith?_ Why would someone write a letter to me addressed as John Smith?

"May I see that?" Koizumi quickly put out before anyone could say or do anything else.

I wanted to know what he's doing. That is _my_ letter, after all. "Just what is it you're trying to do, Koizumi?"

"I believed I could make out the seal and determine our writer," Koizumi said while handing the letter to me, "However, my best efforts seem to have failed."

"What about you, Nagato? You seen this anywhere?" I had to ask something before opening this. I needed to stall.

"No. The symbol or any of the data in the seal do not appear anywhere in my dat-" She stopped mid-sentence. We all looked at Nagato, wide-eyed as if she's found out something dreadful. "However, the Data Integration Thought Entity has information on the insignia," she stated, but just before anyone could say anything and after a short pause, "...which is currently classified to me and by extension, you." Which pretty much killed everyone's hopes. Nagato then returned to her place and sat her gaze on me and my letter.

Isn't classified information Mikuru's thing? Oh well. I'm pretty much done stalling.

"Hey, Kyon?" Miss Asahina had turned to me.

I replied, and she didn't say anything. She just kept looking at me. This lasted for a couple minutes... Now this is getting awkward. "Miss Asahina, what is it you wanted?" I spoke again, but to no avail. Finally she responded.

"Oh, it's nothing. I thought that... never mind." This is completely out of character for her. I had to say something after this awkward turn of events. I asked her if she was alright, but she insisted that she was fine, so I turned my attention back to the mysterious letter. All eyes were on me as I started to peel open the envelope, when I wondered.

"Hey, Nagato... Do you know how long this has been in the clubroom?" Rather than telling you the exact amount of time she responded with (and no, not even in the monotone voice), I'll tell you that it's been there for a couple of hours.

That means this was placed during lunch break. With no reason to back away, I pried open the letter. I decided to read it out aloud... not before clearing my throat, of course. The writing was written awkwardly, with huge gaps in all the wrong places, but I tried my best to make out the letter.

"Dear John Smith, I'm coming. Tomorrow, after Haruhi leaves, stay behind for a while. Go ahead and tell the other club members to, too. The reason I addressed you as John Smith is because it gave me an excuse to hide the letter. Couldn't let Haruhi find it and make me a club member... or a student. In short, I'm from the western parts of the world, which of course would interest her. Of course you're wondering, how am I going to get access to the clubroom even though I'm not a student at North High? Erm... Stop wondering it, please? Yours Faithfully, A Friend." with a little smiley face written afterwards. The room fell into silence. _'Stop wondering it?'_ was this guy one of those cheesy stereotypical government cover-up people that made it pretty obvious that they were up to something?

"W-Who's coming?" Miss Asahina finally spoke out with a little worried (but also very cute!) tone.

"I don't think anyone can answer that." I plainly said as I put down the letter, then Koizumi looked at it and gasped.

I asked him what was wrong and he told me to look at the letter upside down. So I did. The gaps in between the words and sentences made little sense to me, but as I studied it, it looked more and more like the shape of Miss Asahina.

When I realized this, I dropped it with a gasp. "Now why would that be there?" I groaned with a slight tone of anger. I know it's a bit of an OTT reaction, but think about it. Random hidden letter, which when looked at correctly is the upside down shape of Mikuru. Wouldn't that bother you a bit?

While Nagato went back to reading, Miss Asahina took a look at the upside down letter. It took longer for her to grasp, but when she did, she took a big step back with a little wince. Whoever this may be, they have a lot of questions to answer.

* * *

**That's pretty much it for the first chapter. Nothing exciting, nothing too terribly crazy. It's a bit fast, but then what else could I do? Put filler stuff in to bore you out of your minds? I assure you that progress will slow a little bit after this. After all, this is my first story, so go lightly, okay?**

**Make some reviews too, so I can determine what this actually is.**

**(Yes, I wrote this and don't know what it is)**

**Big thanks to Alfonso Ling for reminding me that green is not a creative colour.**


	2. Emiri

**A/N: Thanks you viewers, for the feedback on the first chapter! ^^**

**Also, this chapter's gonna be a bit weird... I think. Idk, you read it and see what you think.**

* * *

_The Club. The God. The Interfaces. The Paradoxes. The Powers. The Words._

_The various gifts of power __are__ 'cool', as you hear people say._

_But how they are used, shows you their true nature._

_Both of them__._

* * *

**EMIRI**

A quiet night. I finished my tea and got up to go to the kitchen to wash and put the cup away. However, when passing my door (I was drinking in the living room of my flat and the kitchen was on the other side of the main hall), the door flung open as someone glomped me to the ground. Yes you heard right. Glomped. I do know what that is, you know.

As I looked at my assailant, I recognized him near-instantly. "Tsuginori?"

"HEY, EMIRIIIIIIIIIIIII~" yelled the joyful face of Tsuginori on top of me. Well, that's how I would imagine it, if that hood wasn't in the way. All I could see was his gaping mouth, as if I was being attacked by some sort of soul-sucker. This didn't scare me, partly because I knew him and partly because of the fact that I'm a Humanoid Interface. Not all Humanoid Interfaces are completely robotic, you know*******1**. Remember Asakura? Little known fact: She's still around. He got up off me, closed the door and let me stand up before continuing.

"Yeah, hi. Is there a particular reason you came to see me, Tsugi?" Well, I had to ask, didn't I? The 'expression' on his 'face' changed back to what it normally is, just those mysterious blue eyes showing up from under that cursed hood. "If you're going to ask me to attempt to remove the hood again, then you're a complete idiot. I've told you a few thousand times that-" He motioned for me to stop.

After a brief pause, he held up a letter with 'John Smith' written neatly on the front. He showed me the back as well, with a seal on it. I felt ridiculously confused. "Why are you showing me this?"

He spoke in a clear, concise tone. "I need you to hide it in their clubroom. Tomorrow."

"So you've come here to abuse my powers? You should give me a good reason to do this." I crossed my arms as I spoke. This was a ridiculous request. He gave it a few seconds, then chuckled.

"Ahhh, Emiri... I see that you, of all people fail to grasp my situation." I could feel my expression becoming more and more fearful as he spoke. "I'm free of them now. Not of the hood yet, but them? Let's just say I both made and cleared the mess. Plus I think I got something a little more than I bargained for when I did." The cup I dropped on the floor when he entered started floating in the air in circles around me. "It's a pretty fun gift, I may say."

My eyes widened. "Telekinesis? You... how?" I took the cup in my hands and it stopped floating.

"Heh. It happened after I finished disposing of their bodies. I think one of them had some kind of experimental fluid in their pocket that broke and evaporated when I incinerated it." I started analyzing him for any changes. Even though I knew I couldn't alter him because of his barrier*******2**, I could immediately see that something had changed. He indeed did have the power to alter the position of data. "You know I'll have to report all of this back to the Entity, yes?"

"Sure. I wanted his approval, too." He's not resisting? Oh well, I've caught him this time, I've sent the... report... The Entity did actually approve. That _wasn't_ a joke. _Everything's_ on his side.

I still don't understand, surely Haruhi would... Oh I see. He wants the back door. He wants to meet the more supernatural Brigade members without the fuss of putting up with Haruhi or any of the other pokey people around there, like Taniguchi. To be honest, I don't think there is a back door. I was lucky to only have a brief encounter and that was to stop the data life form. Well, I'll let them set him straight with that. After all, if I recall, there is no back door. That's probably why the Entity agreed.

I took the letter from him and put it in my pocket. I'll get to work hiding this tomorrow. "Is that all, Tsugi?" He blinked at me for a moment, then tilted his head down.

"That's all." He turned away when I suddenly made the connection. I grabbed his hand before he could move.

"Why would you glomp me, then? That expression, then the sudden change..." Even though I couldn't get his expression at the time, I could tell he was smiling at me. The day we get that hood off...

"It was my thanks for everything. I couldn't return my feelings when I was under their control." I don't understand. Did he think I would like that? Wait, lemme rephrase. How did he know I'd like that? "I understand you couldn't stop them from taking me. It's not your fault." I felt him pull on me, trying to leave my grasp, when I felt something surge within me (I'd analyze this later).

I felt like I was his carer for his whole life, I knew him. And so I did what I did without thinking. I pulled him back with a spin and kissed him. His tongue... I... Ahem. It lasted a while... and then I slowly pulled away, my face just plain red. He stopped for a while. "And is that _your _thanks for everything, I assume?" I nodded. We looked at each other for a while. Then he left. As the door shut, I could feel I had started something.

* * *

Emiri does some story related asterisks for you!

*******1**** The only interface the Entity didn't give emotions to was Yuki. I guess you'd need to not draw any attention to yourself if you're going to observe Haruhi. Especially at such close proximity, too. I know emotions are based on what we call 'senseless noise', but part of my directive is to study this noise, so I collect a generous dose of it to examine and use.**

*******2 ****Tsuginori was born with an anti-data alteration barrier, (the other interfaces on this planet decided to take up making acronyms and we called it A-DAB (This is for future reference (Because I can (Also, brackets))). We couldn't change any of his data at all, read his thought waves, nor could the artifacts (It's been a few months since the Disappearance incident and in those, Haruhi ended up creating objects that could change/manipulate data in ways we don't yet understand) work, either. Later testing showed that our attack data worked, however. All in all, it was very intriguing to the Entity. Of course, the Entity sent an interface to observe him. That would be me (I did of course become a student at North High to help with any situations that arised, and later when Tsugi was taken, I was given a new objective).**

* * *

**A/N: I really don't know what I'm doing or what I've written, do I?**


	3. Tsuginori α

**A/N: I wrote this huge backstory for Tsuginori (cause I can (in fact, this will pretty much double (if not triple when I'm done)) the overall word count so far(also, brackets)). This backstory. Should I just literally put the story behind your back? That would make a lot more sense, actually. Give me directions to your back. Actually don't, that'd be weird. Well, not as weird as this backstory. It gets random. Fast. I think. I don't know :3. NOW CRINGE IN HORROR AT MY WEAK STRUCTURE.~~TNEO**

**Warning: Sudden, Inexplicable Ecchi. Just thought I'd point that out before I blow more people's heads.**

* * *

_A Storyland. Omnipotent and oblivious. Analysis. Temporal Activities. Mind-Boggling Theories. A simple tale._

_To see the reasons behind actions,_

_You must take steps back to find them._

* * *

**TSUGINORI – THE BEGINNING**

We look back to Tanabata, five years ago. This was two years before Haruhi had 'Mr. Smith' draw on the field and when I was about 11 or so.

I lived further west back then (Somewhere in Europe), and was under the control of a mysterious group who had taken me from my home, where Emiri had been sent from Japan to observe him*******1**. Because groups like that are _mysterious_ and it would be _rude_ to say they're not so.

It would be silly for a _mysterious_ group to take him though, right? I'm just a source of intelligence in their eyes. But these guys don't see it that way... for they are...

THE COMPUTER RESEARCH SOCIETY, WESTERN BRANCH*******2** (And also no longer mysterious)! Yep, the CRS (To clarify, this _is_ talking about a branch of the club in North High) had a western branch (before the club even existed in North High...? (Right?)).

I possess a brilliant mind. I have a photographic memory, I look at things objectively, I know a lot... Duh... And I've even made escape attempts sometimes. But that's pretty much it. I look average, brown hair, blue eyes, but I was little bit taller than average.

So if I was so brilliant, why didn't I just escape, anyway? I was trying my hardest. I may be smart, but I was only 11. I could only do so much... Against the CRSWB... Yeah, I didn't think that out, did I?

* * *

So yeah, the CRSWB's home base (or prison, to me) was a stereotypical concrete building, with various gubbings of electrical gadgets and the like running through it. I spent my time in what was called the 'Specimen Area', which was again stereotypical (cause these guys are nerds, right?) structure (a monitored cell with like a vault door, if you lack in imagination).

I wanted to grow up to be an ally or agent of the DITE, immune to data-alteration and doing daring deeds... And I was stuck there...

The year of the Tanabata event. In fact, let's go all the way; the very DAY of the Tanabata event, July the 7th, when I was 13 and Haruhi was making 'Mr. Smith' draw- What. Ok, so the 'we look back' was unnecessary. Big deal! Now let's actually look at what happened.

The CRSWB had just supplied me with my daily meal and after a few hours of not taking the dish, the supplying member filed a report and waited. 2 more members came along and they both unlocked and entered the door to my 'cell'. Which I then walked out of and shut. And that's all the camera saw before I disconnected it. And I saw the light, I was close, I was ever so-

* * *

Nope. They tased me. I woke up in the back of a van and saw the backs of the heads of the driver and his passenger. I could recognize the driver as the closest guard of my 'cell', but I couldn't place the passenger. He was blonde, and wearing a dark blue uniform. That's all I knew.

Then I remembered my self-training and pretended to be asleep. Sure enough, the blonde one turned around, as I could see out of an almost-closed eye. I wasn't sure if he picked up that I wasn't asleep, but I was certain he didn't. I saw more of him. He had a crazed face, like he wasn't trying to believe what he was seeing. I noted that his uniform had what appeared to be a red 'm' embroidered on it.

Then he turned back around and spoke. "S-So, where'd you kidnap him?! Surely this is against the law?"

Then came a voice I knew all too well. "Two things. One, he's been asleep for 3 years," Wait, what? I'd been... huh? The last thing I remembered was being tased... "We thought he was in a coma or something, but we had one of yours confirm that he was just asleep. Nothing could wake him, though."

The other guy spoke again, in a crazier tone. "That doesn't answer my questions! We're still kidnapping!" At least this person had heart. He saw me as an actual human being, rather than an intelligence source.

"He's the source of our intelligence. We're moving him to somewhere here, which is our best option because he doesn't know Japanese. If he escapes, he's got nowhere to go." This explained where I was.

Although I do know Japanese. Emiri taught me during her observations. This conversation I deemed unfollowable, though. These guys were clearly idiots. If they didn't want me to possibly pick up information I could later use against them, why are they speaking English?

I waited for the blonde guy to check on me again, then I picked up a switchblade on the side of the van and pocketed it securely. I couldn't do anything yet. The wrong move, we crash and die. Plus the driver has a gun. Yes, a gun. I don't know where these guys get things, or how they hide them.

"B-But where will I put him? You can't expect me to handle every single thing, just because I'm the president!" Aha. So this is the ringleader. Yet he doesn't have control over what his men do? I decided to make my presence known, seeing as not much good would do from keeping up the facade of being asleep.

"Ah, so you're the president. Nice to meet you." The president turned around to meet his eyes to mine. Both of our blue eyes locked in a stare, before being interrupted by a bump on the road. The president turned back around. "Well he's awake now."

"You think? Well, it's good we've just had the last day of term. We can lock him in the school over the summer" Oh, great. Around two weeks of staying in a locked-up building. Brilliant. Hmm... actually...

"Hey, if you're gonna lock me up in the school, could you at least let me look around?" I don't know why I said that! I just wanted to have some form of freedom before I went mad. Maybe I could find something. I don't know anymore. Their reply took a while. When they finally responded, they said:

"If you co-operate." I had no choice at this point. After all, what could go wrong? If I make them stuff, I'll know how to break it apart.

"Welcome to North High, empty edition," chuckled the driver as he chucked me a rope to bind my hands together with (while pointing his gun at me) as we pulled up to the school gates. I did as directed and we went into the closed school, where we were met by CRS agents.

* * *

"This, my friends," he duly announced before pointing at me, "is the reason why we're still around today." I heard gasps come from our audience.

"Okay, so where are my 3 birthday presents?" are the words I could think of. Everyone laughed.

"How about one big one? We'll be keeping you with us, In the Computer Research Society Clu-" his voice was cut off by the screaming president. "ARE YOU MAD?! HE'S TRIED TO ESCAPE SEVERAL TIMES, KILLED SEVERAL MEMBERS AND YOU WANT TO IMPRISON HIM IN THE CENTER OF OPERATIONS?!" He did have a point.

These guys really were stupid. Doing that would be like keeping people dedicated to bringing down a government away from a government by incarcerating them in said government's headquarters.

"Well, where would you propose we keep him, then? He's promised to work with us..." Wow, I could not emphasise more how idiotic these people are. They're upping their trust toward me that much, all because I agreed to work with them. Just wow. Well, I can't talk. If they're so stupid, how have I not successfully escaped yet?

"Ehh... err... What about the SOS Brigade's clubroom? Of course, we'd have to keep sharp things and anything he could weaponize out, but it'll be a good idea..." 'The SOS Brigade', the president says. Did someone actually make a club to save people's souls? Eh, what am I talking about, this is Japan. Although the thought is quite funny.

At the president's nod, an agent led me to an old building (While pointing her gun at me (It's a good idea too, seeing as I was the one who bound myself)), with were many corridors.

I didn't say anything about it, but signs indicated that this was an place for clubs that didn't need rooms specific for that club.

We passed signs, something about bird watching, the Calligraphy Clubroom, the Computer Research Society Clubroom... Until we reached a door that had a sign saying SOS Brigade Clubroom on it.

* * *

"So... here we are," The agent opened the door, "the SOS Brigade clubroom." I took in its interior. Bookshelves, a whiteboard, chairs, tables... 'Chief'? "Did you know that this is the nuttiest club in the school? If you didn't know, you do now. Led by Haruhi Suzumiya, she's a student here. She gets away with everything in this room."

I noticed the outfits. Did this Haruhi girl wear them? I went over to the outfits behind the whiteboard and examined them. I noticed that the chest area of a maid outfit had a little bit of stretch and wear (more than the rest of the outfit). If this Haruhi person does wear this, she must have huge nawks.

"So how do you know about all this? Are you a student here?" I started to work my magic words on the agent. Might as well find out about the place I'll be staying in for just over two weeks. Heck, if I get lucky, I could make a new friend.

It's always good to get a good footing in a place you're captured in. Even though she's part of an evil computer society conspiracy tag-some-more-bad-sounding-words-to-the-end-of-this group, she is pretty cute. She flicked that green hair of hers, shut the door and spoke a bit more flamboyantly.

"I am, actually. Call me Tsuruya, if you want." Huh. She's telling me her name? Tsuruya looked around quickly and went to lock the door. Wait, does she wanna get laid? She came to me and spoke in a hushed voice. "I'm not actually a part of the CRS. I joined them cause I overheard that they had captured some innocent guy,"

Someone on my side... Finally. I thought I'd lost all hope of leaving this place. She continued, "I wanna help you get out of their influence. Also, since I've done you the deed of telling you my name, I think you should tell me yours."

"Tsuginori," I reached out my hand and she shook it with a smile. After a brief moment I coughed and asked her, "How good are you at smuggling?"

She gave me a big, squishy hug. It took a while for me to compute this, then I realised what she had heard. I chuckled and spoke again. "Smuggling, not snuggling. Although I did enjoy that." I gave her a little kiss on the forehead as she stood again. Before I could speak, we heard footsteps outside and a key in the door.

The door opened to reveal the president, who is now wearing a black pinstripe suit, waving a key with a smile on his face. "I thought I should let you know that even though you can lock the door from the inside, there is such thing as keys. Now, why are you so close to that agent, hmm?" Tsuruya's face practically turned into one of those red airfield landing strip lights for night landings.

After a moment of thinking, I took the maid outfit off from behind the whiteboard and decided to go with what I hope is a reasonable ask. "I was explaining to this here agent that if I'm gonna be kept here, I'd like a maid. I don't want to be alone for so many years again." I tried not to laugh at how much more red Tsuruya's face went. The president looked at us for a while, his face now almost white.

"W-Well, sure. I don't see anything wrong with it, as long as you don't extort things from that Level 2 agent." Why of all things, would you tell me her security clearance? "As long as she's okay with it." Tsuruya stood there, face completely red and shaking all over.

I bet she felt like time stopped right at that moment. A few seconds later, she let out a small sigh and nodded. The president closed his eyes and sighed. "We're counting on you to help us. Show us you're on our side, Tsuginori." He shut the door... and locked it.

* * *

A few seconds later, we heard talking and some footsteps. We assumed that this was guards being appointed to outside the room. I moved and stacked the chairs (We only needed two, after all) while Tsuruya changed into her maid outfit.

I heard her say something about the costume smelling like some Mikuru person. So it's not Suzumiya who wears that, after all. Well Mikuru, whoever you are, I'm certain you have huge knockers. I chuckled a little while I finished with the chairs and moved the tables to an inconspicuous position, but one where if we needed to defend ourselves, we could flip the tables and have an easy barricade.

Once I was done, Tsuruya was getting comfortable in her costume, so I decided to get a little more acquainted with her. After all, I've been their little centrepiece, in their custody for years. Isn't it time I get something of my own? I walked up behind her, and grabbed onto her breasts from behind. "You look so adorable in this costume, Tsuruya."

She didn't say anything, nor did she say anything as I started fondling her. She gave cute little moans, though. I stopped, walked round, and sat on her lap. Her face was a little red after my teasing, of course. She's cute, she's an up-in-your-face kind of person and definitely not afraid to get a little dirty... But she's a little dim upstairs. I guess she'll work.

I hushed my voice. "Hey Tsuruya, could you get something for me?" She perked up at this. "I need a firearm. Something good, maybe get a silencer as well. Can you do that for me?"

She thought about it a bit, then smiled at me, still blushing. I know I'm good at hand-to-hand, but that was 3 years ago, and these guys have guns now. You'd think levelling the playing field would be a fair thing to do.

"Well... I _know_ level 2 is enough to get into the armoury," You guys have an armoury? "It's risky, but sure I'll do it, hun!" She gave me a little peck on the cheek afterward. 'Hun'. She's certainly taking a shine to me. We've only known each other for practically five minutes and we're getting pretty close.

* * *

The door unlocked and opened, where two guys carrying a mattress, some pillows and big duvet walked in and plonked it down where the table and desktop computer at the far end of the room were, in the fashion of a bed. They're being really nice to me now.

Either that, or they've changed their policies. Or they're fans of TsuginoriXTsuruya and they're just fuelling the fires, if that's a thing now. "So err, this is where I'm sleeping, right?" I asked the painfully obvious question.

"Both of you." The president calmly said at the doorway, with a smile. Tsuruya blushed for a little while, then nodded. I looked out the window and noticed the sky was getting dark. As everyone left the room, Tsuruya's face took on the look of realization and she asked in a somewhat meek voice what she was going to sleep in. I of course, decided to abuse this situation.

"It seems that you have _nothing_ to sleep in." I said with a shrug and a smile. I starting checking in that cupboard that was in the corner of the room, underneath some kind of tea station, when she gasped in what I believe was her figuring out what I meant.

She turned to me and said "I-In the nude?" I nodded, trying not to laugh. I know I was being mean, but who'd pass up an opportunity like that? Tsuruya was well endowed and I was pretty curious to see what the rest of her was like. In the few moments we'd been together, I think she caught me checking her out a few times.

My entire thought train stopped when I opened what was a black shoe box that I found in the cupboard, nestled in the back, alongside stuff to make tea with. There were some notes and things, but what struck my attention was the black fabric in some sort of see-through wallet.

* * *

Yawn. It's getting late, so I guess I'll investigate this tomorrow. I glanced over at the digital calendar/clock the CRS had sneakily put up above the door to get an idea of when it was, while putting the box back. August the 15th. I had a feeling I'd need to remember that.

Wait, it's summer right? Isn't Japan on the southern hemisphere, where seasons are reversed due to the tilt of the Earth's axis*******3**? Ehhh... I didn't do much geography, so maybe I'm wrong somewhere.

So as it got late, I flicked off the lights and stripped to my underwear as Tsuruya got out of hers. I took the time to check her out as she blushed and looked away. She certainly was a sight to behold. Her long, green flowing hair, down to her god-given bosom and her divine lower areas... her legs. I meant her legs. Then I snapped out of my trance and led her to bed.

And yes, if you're wondering, we did do things. A lot of things~. But I'm not gonna share that with you, because it was a special moment between us, even though our sudden relationship is somewhat weak and neither of us have said 'I love you' yet, which is kinda weird.

Wait, never mind, she just said it. I love her, too. I'm supposed to say that out loud, aren't I? I wonder if there's a world record for quickest relationship? Cause if so, I just set it.

* * *

Morning of August the 16th*******4**. Time to do stuff. Not that I didn't do stuff last night, cause... well... you get it. Tsuruya clearly wasn't a morning person (who can blame her after last night?), so I went to get the box when Tsuruya spoke. "Hey, about last night... I want you to know I meant everything. I'm not usually like this around people. People say I strike them as a sort of tomboy, which makes you the only person that knows about this side of me. Keep it a secret okay, hun?" She said with a wink and a smile which could make anyone believe she loved you before going back to sleep.

I was surprised that she had such a complex facade, though. Would that sort of false personality be used drive off perverts?

I got the box and took out the packet. I searched it for an opening, when I found that the thing was sealed. What's weirder is, there's no evidence of seams. It's like someone manufacture a plastic bubble around the fabric. Attempts to rip it open showed me the plastic was thicker than what I expected.

Then I remembered the switchblade I got from the van. As soon as I touched the blade to the plastic, there were visible bolts of blue energy sparking out of it and at me. I flinched of course, when I realised that the energy wasn't doing anything.

So I tried to cut it again. Through the non-existent pain of being zapped continuously, I managed to penetrate the plastic. When I did, the zapping stopped. I found it much easier to open now, and when I did, I took out the fabric. It unfolded in the shape of a hood in my hands and a concealed note dropped out.

It read 'Artifact #79834: Unknown Purpose. Testing is not recommended, as data analysis suggests that once wo-' The writing was smudged up until where it said 'Therefore, for such reason, all testing on this has been suspended indefinitely.'

Well, it doesn't seem too bad. (Note from future self: This is the stupidest thing I will ever do in my entire life) I tried on the hood. It felt a bit odd, but there was nothing wrong with it. I took it off... No, I tried to take it off. I tried again. And again. This thing's stuck.

I tried doing a handstand, prying it off with a ruler I found... and other various things, to try and get it off, but to no avail.

It's weird how's it's on... It's... sort of... It's on me, but it's not. It's not touching my skin, or my hair, like it's floating a couple centimetres off of every surface of me. But it's staying there. Not touching or moving by or with any force can shift it from its position. I even tried penetrating it with the switchblade (facing up from the forehead, of course) to no avail.

With a sigh, I pocketed the switchblade and went to find a mirror. If I was gonna wear this thing, I'd need to know what I looked like in it. I found a small mirror that you'd typically use in your hand, which showed me the reflection of two glowing eyes in the darkness underneath this hood.

I felt gentle hands on my shoulders. Rather than keep this a secret, I decided to voice it to dear Tsuruya. "What I horrible mistake I've made..." My voice sounded deeper than normal. Maybe an effect of the hood? I can't jump to conclusions, yet. I just hope I wake up, like this was all a dream.

"What did you do?" asked a worried Tsuruya as she got into her maid outfit. I tapped at the hood as my only and final answer. I turned to see Tsuruya next to me, with a tear in her eye, knowing she could very well be the last person to see my face. In a whisper, she said "I'll get you that gun." and walked off and out of the door. After flashing her security clearance to the guards (and another thing at me) the door shut, leaving me to my own devices.

* * *

*******1 ****After Tsugi's kidnapping, she searched for him, but could not find him due to her search taking 2 years, stopping abruptly due to **_**the Tanabata event**_**, where Yuki was sent to observe Haruhi and Emiri was then given the directive to study noise, so there's her alibi for you.**

*******2 ****Everyone knows the CRS were evil, right? I know it's silly, but it's an original idea ;_; We're running out of those these days... Besides, this **_**is**_** a Romance/Adventure/Humour as I said.**

*******3**** I snuck this in here, because I was pretty much concerned about how Japan is- Wait, lemme look up a World Map. It seems Japan IS on the northern hemisphere. Darn. Get back to the southern hemisphere, so I can nitpick how the Endless Summer should have been the Endless Winter and how the Disappearance should have been in the summer! Even though it's not... Damn, I believed that all this time... (I wrote this asterisk after writing that line)**

*******4**** I'm assuming the Endless Summer begins on the midnight between August the 16****th**** and August the 17****th**** (cause I'm stupid), so I'm starting preparations for this storyline on the 16****th**** so stuff carries over onto the first day of the loop as planned.**

* * *

**A/N: ...So am I funny yet?**


	4. Tsuruya

**A/N: Yes, it blends.**

* * *

_Full of wild, fantastical tales. Her eccentricity both guides and blinds her. Always leads to speculation. Are bound to make a mess of everything. Will confuse almost everyone. A protective lie._

_To find out the truth about someone,_

_Simply ask._

* * *

**TSURUYA**

I love that innocent little fella... I'm not sure about the hood though. I hope it doesn't try to keep our lips apart! Last night was really fun... I exposed everything!

Well, ok. Literally and... err... _literally_? I showed him my true self, not that tomboyish shell I wear when I'm around the other agents, or when I'm at school.

I was surprised at how much he loved my breasts. I can't imagine why people would like these things. I mean, mine are what? They're coming up to Ds, I think. _Squish squish_.

I don't remember the last time I checked. I could check my bra, but I'm not wearing one under this maid outfit (which I think shows off my curves a bit too much).

Soooo yeah! The armoury! The gun he wanted... Yeah, errr, it's this way.

So back to Tsuginori~, it does seem a little weird that our situation is all 'meet, talk, instant love, _sex_'.

Well to you, it might. I don't see anything wrong with that! Nothing at all.

I'll tell you something though: Sex is _so much fun_! Last night was an absolute _blast_.

And now back to the situation at hand. I'm gonna waltz into this armoury. "Hey fe-" Oh right, it's empty. Tee hee.

Sooo... small firearms. One he'd like, probably powerful. With a silencer. Hummm...

Ooh, what about this? 'P226 Combat'. It looks cool, it's small... Comes with a silencer.

Wha-cha! Hoi-ya! Heh. Bet he'll love this.

I'll bring an extra mag... Although, where will I hide this gun? Hmmm...

Oh, I have a place big enough to put them! Expanded last night, as of fact. Should put the safety on for this. I want to have children, you know.

I wonder if anyone's done this before? No, not hiding stuff on them, silly. Hiding stuff like this in this place.

I'm gonna be daring and hide it with the silencer still on. The mag I can just hide with the mags for my gun.

Ok, here we go... hatchaaaaaa- ow. That err... that feels nice, actually.

There! Completely inconspicuous, I think. I hope I can walk enough without orgasming into this thing.

La la la... laaaa~~ _Oooh~. _I'm gonna need him filling this space when I get back. Just walking is turning me on.

I entered the Brigade clubroom with relative ease, I don't think the guards caught on~...

Time to announce my return. "Hey, hun!~"

I get a kiss! Nya~ "Heya, Tsuruya," then his voice shifts to that cute whisper, "You got it?"

I get the gun out from inside me (to make room for him), to look up and see his eyes pretty wide. Tee hee, the things a woman can do~

So, as he takes the gun off my hands and puts it somewhere, I turn to the wall and put my hands against it~

Couple seconds later, he puts a hand to my face. "The idea's nice, but I like to see your gorgeous face as I do you~" I couldn't be any more turned on right now~~ I just stand there defiantly, my hands against the wall and my hips back, ready to accept him.

"Heh... Ok, then." I feel my panties coming down, as I shake my hips a little to entice him a little more... then he enters me.

Much better than any damn gun, that's for sure~ Flesh and blood, that's the way I roll.

Mmm~ So good! I'm gonna let my feelings run absolutely wild as he pounds me hard.

And the sex went as expected. Great, fun, hot. Yawn. Did we spend the entire day getting it on? I look up at the clock and it's nearly 11. Needless to say, we slept fine.

* * *

**A/N: I regret nothing.**

**Well, maybe I should explain. I did put a lot of work into Tsuginori Alpha, and I thought I should do a little Tsuruya chapter with a little sex in it, cause I can and it's part of the story. Besides, we're gonna need variation as there's gonna be a lot of Tsuginori next. I mean it! I'm planning on doing eight chapters of the same thing! :D**

**I kid, I kid. I'm gonna put a very special mechanic into play, though. Just you wait and see. For now, eat this up. Nom nom nom nom nom.**


	5. Tsuginori I

**A/N: Whew, OKI DOKI. THE START OF THIS SUBPLOT-SUBPLOT-PLOT (AKA Story arc.). Erm... Yeah. I think that's what I should call it. So as you've gathered from reading Tsuginori Alpha (and the end of Tsuruya's little adventure), this is set during the Endless Eight. I'm pretty sure the Endless Eight started at August the 17th (Recall what Koizumi says), and if my gut instinct IS right and it's the midnight of the 17th and it actually starts on the 18th, well you can enjoy an extra day then, can't you? :3  
Of course at this point, you'd be thinking that this entire turn of story is deviating completely from the idea of the story in the title. I assure you, the picture is much bigger than you realise.  
I also had a little argument with myself about how the first loop should be counted. I decided that the first two weeks, where everything would progress as it should without anyone knowing that it would loop would be called the Zeroth Loop. After all, what's the point in counting it, if it's not part of the loop? When everything(?) resets on the 31st after the first two weeks, that would then be the first loop.  
Wait, did you think I was kidding when I said the next bunch of chapters would be Tsuginori? Pahahahaha. I'm mean like that. Rest assured, the next POV char will be unexpected indeed ;)**

* * *

_Some will make you feel complete disbelief. Due to her persona and power. Which in turn hurts many people depending on the analysis. Depending on which time you're from, you can either improve or degrade the situation. Are any of them even true? Told for everyone's safety._

_They say making progress is like jumping through hoops._

_If you replaced the h with an l, would you get the same result?_

* * *

**THE ETERNITY OF TSUGINORI I**

Morning of the Zeroth Loop - 14 Days Remaining

August the 17th. Two more weeks in this place. In fact, not even that, cause they'll want to move out before the education industry take this place back. That is if I don't escape before then.

I noticed that the cleaner appears to be some sort of liason. Someone calling themself the Student Council President appears frequently, too. Has the corruption reached further than I can see?

None of that mattered, anyway. Today I decided to make some sort of attempt at freedom. Today I would ask.

I knocked at the door, and when it was opened, I asked for an audience with the computer club president. They said they'll get someone and shut the door.

So I'll find out more stuff from Tsuruya. "Hey Tsuruya, tell me more about the SOS Brigade."

Tsuruya looked at me for a little bit, then turned her head. "Well you see, eheh, I don't know all that much about them. Have I told you about Haruhi Suzumiya?" I shook my head. And she proceeded to tell me about Haruhi and her eccentricities and how people thought she was absolutely _deranged_.

She also told me about the other members of the brigade, like the Itsuki Koizumi, who almost always smiles, the Mikuru Asahina who _does_ in fact has big breasts, so my suspicions were confirmed. Tsuruya says she's about a size bigger and she also happens to be her friend, which is cool.

She told me about the quiet Yuki Nagato, who appears to be emotionless and stays in one corner of the clubroom _all the time_ during a club gathering.

Then she told me about Kyon. I guess I could sympathize with him. After all, he was kinda trapped in a situation where he was innocently dragged into that club with 'Haruhi The Nutcase' as his superior, I can see why he acts so dark about pretty much everything.

From what I hear, he sounds pretty cynical.

Apparently they recently went to some kind of island for a holiday recently. Sounds like... fun.

The door opened to reveal the computer club president. "You called? Hey, where'd you get that hood?"

So, time to reveal my reasons for calling for this guy. I asked him to let me to go out and find someone. I also asked him to tell me what he knew about Haruhi Suzumiya.

For some reason, this made him go a little bit red in the face, granting the search and considering the other ask.

So, myself, Tsuruya and a CRS agent went out looking for Emiri Kimidori, starting with asking around the SOS Brigade members.

The computer club president gave me Kyon's phone number (Why he had it was beyond me), so I gave it a ring.

"Haruhi, I know I'm late. Yell 'penalty' at me for when I'm there, okay?" came the voice on the other end.

I decided to give him a shock. "Hello."

"Wha-... Who is this?" Mr. Grumpy responded.

I told him that I was a friend and that I'd like to know where Emiri Kimidori lives (I told him I was an acquaintance, I didn't ask straight up, of course) and that if he doesn't know, he could direct me to someone who could.

He replied by giving me the phone number of Yuki Nagato. I thanked him and hung up. When I think about it, he was pretty easy to convince.

Even though I was telling him the truth, from what Tsuruya said, Kyon's a bit of a skeptic, especially when it comes to new information like that. Heck, anyone would in that situation. But he just believed me straight away and gave me Yuki's number. Does he not care?!

I forcefully stopped my thought train and rung Yuki's number. I was met with the sound of breathing.

"Hello, is this Yuki Nagato?" Was what I said. Honestly, did you expect me to say anything else? My question was rewarded with a simple 'Yes'.

"I'd like to know where Emiri Kimidori lives, please. I'm an acquaintance of hers, but it's been a long time since we last spoke." After a brief moment, I was met with an address and room number. I thanked her and hung up.

I did think to myself, though. I rung her and immediately asked for an address, unlike I did with Kyon. Yet she didn't ask questions about why I wanted to know... Is Nagato used to this kind of behaviour, maybe?

Maybe that's how Haruhi treats the brigade members and they've gotten so used to it, a random person can call, ask them things and get a straight up response?

I don't know. I'm inclined to believe anything at this point, what with a bunch of dumb people capturing me for seemingly no reason, yet I can't escape from them as easily as I should be.

On top of that I'm in a ridiculously straightforward relationship with Tsuruya (not that I minded, she's good company (and great in bed, may I add))

By the time we got to Nagato's apartment complex, it was pretty late, as we spent a lot of time eating and talking and Tsuruya kept kissing me in front of the other agent.

We went up to the building and buzzed the intercom. Before I could say anything, the doors opened.

After asking the receptionist for the floor of the room number Yuki told me, we went up and knocked on the door.

The door opened. No person behind it, no nothing.

We all walked into the apartment, the door shutting itself behind us and into an almost empty room with a kotatsu and a lavender haired girl sitting at said kotatsu.

And the time came again for me to be obvious. "You're not Emiri..." The girl shook her head.

Then Tsuruya spoke. "You're Yuki Nagato!" And the girl nodded.

After a while, she spoke. "I do not understand the situation, I require information. I have read Emiri's reports on the subject, but there is no information about the artifact you are wearing." She's a Humanoid Interface...

I guess that explains how she took the phone call, probably instantly matching my voice to Emir- Wait, she's talking about...

She means _my hood_! Maybe she can help me with this damn thing. "You know how to get this off?" _Please_ be able to remove this thing. Although I don't know if my barrier will prevent her from getting it off.

"I do not." Damn. "However, if you allow me to place a data line which will allow me to detect any changes in your data over the period of which you are wearing that hood, we may be able to find out what the effects are."

Nagato then went to explain about how the hood was sealed by a protective barrier which stung and forced back the hand of anyone attempting to open it. Of course for me, this only resulted in the blue lightning attacking me due to my barrier.

Well I hope the hood does something cool in exchange for me not being able to take it off. I mean, this data line, it's not _alteration_, it's _addition_, so really my barrier shouldn't affect that.

Of course, I let Nagato do her thing (which did work) and she eventually gave me the address of Emiri and then I thought it was time to call it a day.

Tsuruya kept asking me what that was all about and I told her that I'd explain back in the clubroom.

We tried to walk out, but were stopped by the motionless body of the agent that was with us. Nagato then explained she had frozen him and afterward unfroze him.

He was very confused, but we explained to him that he bumped his hand and fell unconscious, while we got what we needed.

When we got back, we noticed there was a commotion among everyone at the building. While me and Tsuruya returned to the Brigade clubroom, the agent went to 'the meeting room' to find out what was going on.

At the clubroom, I explained to her how I practically grew up with Emiri before these guys took me and how she was a Humanoid Interface, to which she got pretty confused and a _little scared_, but I assured her that everything was fine and we went to sleep... Not before _calming her down_.

I'll let you have a few wild guesses on _how I did that_.

* * *

Morning of August the 18th, Zeroth Loop - 13 Days Remaining

A new day. After we ate breakfast, the computer club president came into the room and started a conversation about me, asking why I wanted to know about Haruhi with a _very defensive _attitude about it.

I explained to him that I was merely curious about someone who had influenced so many people so much.

Eventually he gave in and told me that she treated him like some kind of subordinate, which started with some blackmail involving Mikuru (yes, he told me the details). Wonder what it felt like for her.

He stopped when I asked him if it was springy. His face went from confusion to anger to sad to whatever-that-is, I could even sworn he said 'yes' under his breath at one point.

I laughed so hard when I told him I was kidding. His reaction was funny indeed.

After all that, I asked him if I could go visit Emiri's apartment. Apparently she claimed to be his boyfriend before for some reason. All he could remember about it was... pictures of a _cricket_? Odd.

Whatever. I just had to see her. It's been 5 years. Before we went, I rearranged the items in the black shoe box. Just so it made a little more sense in there.

So this time, an agent didn't accompany us, instead an agent shadowed us and we were wired. Well that's great.

They put these things round our necks... I don't know what it was or what it was supposed to do, but when the agent putting them on said 'Don't say anything that would expose our operation, nor what we do,' I got the idea that this was their way of keeping control, so I kept my word.

When we got to the complex Emiri was staying in, we buzzed the intercom and asked for Emiri. It seems she recognized my voice as the doors opened.

This place looks similar to Nagato's place, but it's in completely the wrong spot to actually be Nagato's place. What is it with Humanoid Interfaces and apartment complexes?

Well, I shouldn't judge so early, I mean I've only seen two different interfaces use the same kind of living area to house themselves... so far, of course. There's evidently more interfaces.

We took the elevator up to the floor, then knocked on her door. After a few seconds, it opened to reveal the smiling face of Emiri.

I wanted to hug her _so bad_, but... there was something stopping me. It's weird, like a... I can't move my body to try and hug her. After a quick introduction to Tsuruya, Emiri let us in and we talked in her living room.

Unlike Nagato's place, this flat was nicely furnished, with decorations to boot.

"Miss Nagato told me about the hood. This is a _very dangerous _thing you've done, Tsugi-chan." ...Tsugi...chan? Huh. "You'll be pleased to know that we've detected no abnormalities from the hood as of yet, however I must bring you up to speed on the situation."

Then she went to talk about Nagato, who I already knew was working for the DITE. She talked about Mikuru Asahina, who is from the future. And Itsuki Koizumi, who's really an esper.

What's that? I know the word roughly translates to psychic, but I imagine it can't be that simple... It _is_ Japan, after all. She explained that the 'espers' here had some sort of agency, dedicated to stopping Haruhi Suzumiya destroying our current way of life.

So what is an esper? Apparently, what she knows about these espers, is that they are people who are completely normal, except under certain circumstances. She told me what they can do, what a closed space is, what a shinjin is and how this all occurs.

I glanced over at Tsuruya, who was taking this all in, but she looked really scared. Then she told us about Haruhi and her power. She told me about the events 3 years ago and how the energy released caused me to sleep for 3 years.

I have to admit that it was weird how when I woke up, my muscles weren't deteriorated as one's would normally be when not using them for an extended period of time. That's because my physical body was _apparently_ placed into a form of stasis, which preserved my muscle mass and mental state.

This is all pretty deep. Then I realised the wires. Emiri told me that the signal was being hijacked and our conversation replaced with a falsified one, which is being managed by a friend of hers. If it was Nagato, she'd say. Who's this other friend?

I tried to tell her that I was in captivity, but as much as I tried to move my mouth or tongue when doing so, nothing happened. I think she knows, though. She said that there is nothing she can do about it at the moment.

Tsuruya started asking questions in a timid voice, asking what will happen to us and everyone else. Emiri said she was unsure.

She also said she saw them doing all these summer activities together earlier and that they are likely _still_ doing them.

She then brought us up to speed on what happened, how Kyon and Haruhi got trapped in a closed space that Haruhi was trying to make a new world in, how he went back in time 3 years ago to help Haruhi break into the school grounds and how Emiri herself had to go to the clubroom as part of a plan with Yuki to investigate the trouble behind a symbol Haruhi drew.

After our talk, we said our goodbyes and left. It was getting pretty late, so when we got back, we went straight to sleep. No sex, this time. I think we were too spent trying to understand the situation we were in and what was happening.

* * *

Morning of August the 29th, Zeroth Loop - 3 Days Remaining

Yawn. This past week's been uneventful. We visited Emiri a couple times over the past 11 days, trying to get a better understanding of what the hood was and how we could take it off, to no avail whatsoever.

We ate, we talked, played games... That is until the the driver back from when I was 'moving in', so to speak, entered.

"Alright, listen up. We want you to make us a thing." ...A _thing_? Wha- "Something that will, erm... you know, help. That's it." Then he left. What a stupid request.

One, what am I coming up with, two, how am I supposed to make this thing in two days and three, what do they want it to do?!

And then Tsuruya said one of the funniest things I'll hear this side of December. "Do they think you're _Toe-Knee Steak_ or something?" It took me a while to figure this one out, but when I did, I burst into laughter.

Oh Japan, you and your take on western culture.

"I'll give them a thing." I whispered back to Tsuruya. "Let's escape. Kill em all." Maybe that's a bit too heartless... Wait. "Well actually, I want to interrogate the computer club president."

Tsuruya thought for a moment, then nodded. "None of this makes sense, anyway. Why would the CRS do all of this?" I couldn't really argue, since it was the only way I knew them, however, if they really _are_ just a club, then why the whole operations thing?

Now I could only think about escaping.

They're likely to leave us to the very last thing, meaning they'd try to move us on the 31st, before the teachers come back... but it's too late to bother myself about all that. I should get some sleep.

After we slept, we planned in secret through the 30th and decided to strike on the 31st, when almost all the agents were gone.

I find it awkward that the relationship between Tsuruya and the CRS is dwindling so much. I mean, she's an agent, right? Why aren't they treating her like one? Is she now suddenly an accessory to my 'crimes'?

* * *

Morning of August the 31st, Zeroth Loop - About 16 Hours Remaining

After we ate, I put the tables on their sides, as a fallback option in case they decided to push back. I wrote a note for the SOS Brigade, in case we died trying to escape.

I placed that in the black shoe box and got my gun out of the cupboard.

Everything was going swimmingly. We waited until the guard's shift change, so we talked, kissed and went over our plan a few times before we heard the shuffle of feet.

That was our cue. We bust open the door, Tsuruya covered me from the other direction while I planted 4 shots into the unsuspecting guard's heads, killing them _instantly_.

We progressed down the corridors, looking for a phone. There weren't that many CRS agents around, as planned... But we still needed a safe extraction.

When we found one, Tsuruya was on lookout while I called Emiri's number. Before I could say anything, she said 'We know.' and hung up.

I guess that means extraction's already planned. We took our steps to the entrance carefully, when we stumbled upon the computer club president in the hallways.

He surrendered to us _before we even pointed a gun at him_. It's like he _knew_ we were going to escape.

As our prisoner, the computer club president came with us to the entrance where we waited while keeping an eye out for agents.

Sure enough, a car came. We got out of the glaring headlights and got in. Once we fit me, Tsuruya and the computer club president in the back, we drove off away from the school. Finally, _freedom_.

I looked to our driver, Yuki and our other passenger, Emiri. I didn't know Yuki could drive... then again, she probably downloaded instructions.

With Emiri here, I thought this would be a good time to poke at the computer club president. "Hey look, it's your girlfriend!" Of course, Emiri blushed profusely when I said this. Tsuruya mock punched me in the shoulder.

Emiri and the computer club president talked a lot throughout the drive to wherever we were going.

It was late when we turned up at her complex. We bid Yuki goodbye, and went up to Emiri's flat.

I did ask her yet again to try and remove the hood, but still to no avail. _Whatever_ this thing's effect is, please make yourself apparent soon.

We discussed what we were going to do, when it was decided that Emiri would allow us to stay until we found the proper accomodation. Apparently, the computer club president didn't have a _real_ home, but he was in fact co-erced to stay there and ended up becoming prisoner like us.

But somehow he gained command. I assumed he friendlied with them. So wait, the CRS has a sort of '_real leader_'? There must be more behind them than I think there is.

Then of course, Tsuruya being the crazy gal she is, brought up the fact that the apartment only has two beds.

Both Emiri and the computer club president went pretty red. Since I and Tsuruya were bound to be sleeping together, she was ending up with the computer club president.

I myself, was trying to hold back laughter. But that ultimately failed when they both tried to start a sentence _at the same time_.

Of course, I got up, apologized and they eventually came to a small agreement. Although Emiri glanced at me for a second or so... like she was telling me that she'd rather share the bed with me and Tsuruya.

If I were to assume that, It'd probably be a case of 'she wants to be with me' rather than 'i don't trust this guy', due to the fact she's an interface.

And if that even is the case, why me? Don't tell me that she missed me so much, she loves me?

I shook the thought out of my head. Surely there has to be another explanation (Note from future self: There _isn't_).

So we ate and went to bed. And no, we _didn't_ have a pillow fight (although I imagine that would be quite fun), we had what Tsuruya called 'celebratory sex'.

We were a bit loud, though. Her more than me. I think it was her voicing her joy that we were free... or that she freed me.

Although I don't understand her situation, though. She joins CRS to help me, falls in love with me over the course of _5 minutes_, then somehow she ends up with me as a _prisoner_, yet helps me escape.

I did say she was a bit dim upstairs. Hey, wait. How is she not pregnant yet, what with all the times I've _planted my seed_, so to speak.

I know I can finish outside (or in her mouth, which is pretty cute, too), but she says to like the feeling of being filled up more, so I oblige (although I finish in her mouth now and again. As I say, it's _pretty cute_).

It's the least thing I could do (no pun intended) for her kindness and patience over these past two weeks.

Wow, I've gotten far off track with these thoughts. "Hey hun, you look a little spooked. What's up?"

I told her I was concerned about where I was finishing our little adventures and she responded by giving me a wide smile whilst pulling out a little white box and giving it a shake.

Morning after pills. A pack of 100. Geez, I wonder if she asked one of the agents to get them for her. I didn't even know they made those. I wonder if she knows they don't always work. I liked the idea of having children with Tsuruya. I wonder how they'd turn out.

Although I don't really think I should do it with this hood on. I'm not sure what the effect would be.

We kissed for a little while before actively attempting to sleep. I wanted to embrace our new world. It felt like forever in there... (Note from future self: I'm an idiot.)

* * *

Morning of August the 17th, First Loop - 14 Days Remaining

Strange... I wake up, but I've either not immediately opened my eyes, or I'm blindfolded. Already I feel something's wrong.

I open my eyes to see... The ceiling. But not the ceiling of the bedroom me and Tsuruya were sleeping in, in Emiri's flat.

It looked more like... the ceiling of the Brigade clubroom. I blinked a couple of times, convincing myself this was a bad dream. Heck, I already was convinced from the get go.

Huh? I'm _still lucid_. Odd. I looked around as slowly as I could... And again... And again... And again.

I still can't believe what I'm seeing. I look up at the digital calendar above the door, expecting to see September the 1st... If I've been brought back here, I can easily escape.

It hasn't come on, yet. Leaving me in suspense, huh. But then I realise... How can I? If anyone came, surely Emiri could take care of it all? _No-one _can stand up to the powers a Humanoid Interface can wield.

Well, they _have_ taken me from her once before...

Then the calendar flicks on. _August the 17th_.

Shocked...

Frozen solid...

I find myself unable to move...

This can't be happening. This is a joke, surely.

I look beside me to Tsuruya, fast asleep. I wake her up. I ask her the first thing that comes to mind, "Tell me about the SOS Brigade.", expecting her to tell me that she's already told me what she knows.

Tsuruya looked at me for a little bit, then turned her head. "Well you see, eheh, I don't know all that much about them. Have I told you about Haruhi Suzumiya?"

Dear Gods... I beg thee to end this cruel joke. It's stale now, and _definitely_ not funny. "Hey honey, are you okay? You look terrified."

I'm gonna try to play along, no matter how much I feel like crying. "Yes... you have. You told me two weeks ago that everyone thinks she's deranged... Then a week ago we found out she has this manipulative power to change slash make whatever she feels like through Emiri."

Tsuruya gives me a weird look. "...Emiri? Huh?" I_ immediately _go into panic mode, grabbing Tsuruya by the shoulders and shaking her.

"YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER! THIS ISN'T FUNNY, TSURUYA, CUT IT OUT!" I stop shaking her to get her reply, she HAS to remember something.

I see her watery eyes... She responds to me in a teary, sniffly voice. "Tsugi-chan... Don't do that, pleease. I really don't know anything, please stop... Tsugi-chaaan~..." ...Tsuruya's too dim to act this well...

...I have to accept what appears to be the truth, that the last two weeks has somehow not happened. I take her into my arms, giving her a kiss and holding her close. "...I'm sorry, honey. I promise I won't do anything like that ever again, but please believe me for what I'm about to say."

I gave a pause, desperately hoping for her to spring back to her peppy mood and say something like 'PSYCHE! You silly Tsugi-chan, how could I forget something like that!', even though that's not her attitude toward me, nor would she play that kind of prank after what I've been through. I had to look for something, though...

She didn't. She held back tears, and slowly nodded. I feel like I've just traumatized her. She honestly doesn't remember. I explained to her what happened the past two weeks, her expression getting more and more scared as I explain.

At the end of all that, she asks one question. "...Okay... Can you prove this?"

"Last night, you told me you're on the pill and you showed me this jumbo box of 100." Her face... I just can't describe. It's like a mix between terror and realization.

I held her tight. "Don't worry... You may not remember it, but we're going to fix this. Now, I need to give you a _real_ apology for what I did." Her face instantly shifted from that look of shock to one of curiosity.

I laid her back down and crawled toward her nether regions, getting my head closer and closer. I started passionately licking at her gorgeous, soft (and now of course wet) clit.

I glanced up a little to see her face with her slightly open mouth, closed eyes and her cheeks tinted _ever so slightly _with a blush, ready to accept what I had in store.

I teased her soft spot the best I could, whilst rubbing her with one of my hands. I kept this up for a while, progressing harder and faster as the rate of her moans increased.

Eventually she got to her climax, as she arched her back and sprawled out where she was. I could look at the look she had on her face forever. She clearly enjoyed it, as she was in full bliss.

I lay beside her nude body as she recovered and when she did, she gave me a little kiss and a smile. "That's one heck of an apology... And I accept."

Before we could do or say anything else, the president burst into the room. After a little awkward pause of him realising what we'd just done, he said there was a call for me.

I gave Tsuruya a quick kiss goodbye before she changed into the maid outfit, before going with the president to where we had our caller on hold.

I picked up the answered phone off the desk and spoke into it. "Tsuginori speaking."

And after a few seconds, the tender voice of Emiri replied "This might sound a little weird, but... erm... Do you remember... yesterday?" A feeling of hope washed over me.

Someone who's memories actually _matched_. I tried to reply, but couldn't find the words. I ended up blaring into the phone with tears in my eyes, "YES, YES I DO! THANK GOD SOMEONE REMEMBERS."

While silence came through the phone, I noticed that everyone in the room, all the agents, the president, were shooting me this wild look, as if I'd gone mad.

Suddenly another voice came, punctuating the silence from both the phone and the room with it's monotonousness that I could only recognize as Yuki.

"Come immediately to Emiri's apartment... And bring Tsuruya." The phone went to a dial tone before I could say anything else.

I wasted no time bolting out of the room and past a dozen agents as what looked like a student who was late for class, but ecstatic about it, straight to the clubroom.

When I arrived, I literally kicked open the door to see Tsuruya's expression of surprise. "Tsuruuuyaaaaaaaaaaaa~! We've got a place to go!" I announced to the room as if I had just won the National Lotto.

Then I saw what she had in her hand. "...Tsugi-chan? What's this?" I looked at her hand.

She was holding what looked like the note I wrote for the Brigade in case I- wait, WHAT?! I rushed over to where she was.

This was no doubt the note I wrote for the Brigade. I sighed and explained this to her, while ripping the note up and throwing it out of the window.

I was puzzled to find that of all the things to stay the same, that note was- Wait. I peered inside the box. _Everything_ in that box was as _I_ left it, As _I_ left it! Not as the Brigade left it or whatever.

I don't think I even touched it til the 18th. Before then, I got the hood out of there.

In what was a spur of the moment, I grabbed the box and got Tsuruya to come with me to Emiri's complex, where I defiantly walked past (and sometimes through the agents) to get to the president.

I then nabbed the president and walked straight past/through (delete where applicable) the remaining agents to get to some form of transport.

And through whatever, I drove the president, Tsuruya and the box to Emiri's complex.

When we got there, the doors opened before I even thought of pressing for the intercom. Come to think of it, the elevator ride went surprisingly smooth, as well.

When we got to Emiri's apartment, the door was already open and Emiri was in the living room with Nagato.

Tsuruya and the president were re-introducted to Nagato and Emiri, while I watched Tsuruya rattle off her questions with pure interest.

Well, okay. I was watching _other_ parts of her, too (because I'd dragged her out in the maid outfit, she looked so hot in it~).

Once the formalities were over, Emiri spoke. "Yesterday on August the 31st, at midnight, time reset to the midnight between August the 16th and August the 17th." ...Huh?

"The reason Tsuginori remembers, is because at the exact same time, the artifact he is wearing emitted a data pulse, sort of shielding him from it's effects." ..._Sort of_?

"His physical position and state were reset, however everything else remained unaffected." So _that's_ what the hood does.

"Furthermore, analysis of the pulse revealed more effects of the hood. It seems that the pulse stems is it's ability to make the wearer transcend alterations in the timeline." Wait, what? I can do that?

I immediately motioned for her to pause. "Just what is the origin of this hood?"

"It was found in the residence of Mikuru Asahina, believed to have been created by Haruhi Suzumiya." Why was it there?

I looked over to see Nagato falling through a portal on the ceiling, to fall through a portal on the floor, which appeared to lead to the portal on the ceiling.***1**.

Emiri continued with her explanation. "As a result, Tsuginori has woken up this morning on August the 17th, remembering everything from the past two weeks, the events of which have been erased."

_Erased_? By the time reset? "We remember the past two weeks because the Data Integration Thought Entity transcends space-time and by extension, us." That _sorta_ makes sense...

Then the president opens his mouth. "So what happens to your physical position?"

"It remains as it was before the reset." Obviously. The reason I don't remain is because my physical position is reset along with time. Even though staying where you are after a time reset can be seen as a bad thing, I happen to know that Humanoid Interfaces can teleport.

Then I wondered. "What would the purpose of a hood that could transcend the timeline possibly be?"

"Most likely for your wearing. However, there are other theories as to what it could be. The theory I have suggested is the most agreed upon." Figures... I think.

...But why was there a time reset? "What happened to the time to make it reset?" Tsuruya jumped in before I could.

Then Nagato spoke, after Emiri holding the floor for so long. "The reset was caused by Haruhi Suzumiya. Current theories are being speculated as to why this happened. It should be noted that at the end of last week, Haruhi Suzumiya appeared to be discontent with the activities she and the rest of the Brigade he done over the course of the last two weeks."

Time to barrage Yuki with questions. "So what about the other Brigade members? Do any of them remember?"

"Observations during today's activities have shown that they do not. It is entirely possible for them to remember, due to their connection and proximity to Haruhi Suzumiya. However, it is required to make more observations before determining how much they know." That makes sense. After all, you can't do the equation without all of the variables.

"Furthermore, it is also entirely likely there will be more than one reset, due to the events of today having a 97.9% similarity to the events two weeks ago." ...As sad as that is to hear, that _also_ makes sense.

Then I had an idea. "Nagato, if this does continue and the Brigade find out that they're stuck in a time loop, I'd like you to phone me immediately and call me over to discuss with them. It's possible that my contribution to anything we come up with is going to make the likelihood of stopping said time loop more possible."

Yuki stared straight ahead for a while, then nodded.

"Am I to understand this box and it's contents transcend the timeline in a similar fashion to this hood?" Yuki nodded again. That was a pretty simple explanation.

Yuki spoke again. "The box itself is also a product of Haruhi Suzumiya's powers, but it is an older artifact. We decided to use it for storing dangerous artifacts like the hood."

"So what do we do now?" asked Tsuruya.

Emiri then decided to grab the spotlight. "As sad as it sounds, you should return to North High and be put into an effective standby until we find anything. Feel free to try new things, or poke around the CRS for information we might find useful."

"Wait, could we get like a person or something to help us with this loop business? That is if it does happen, of course." Silence hung in the air for a moment before they spoke again.

At this point, there was the sound of a shower turning off. Wait, someone was showering _the whole time_?

I looked around to see Tsuruya and the president still in their places. So who could that be?

"I hope I'm not too late for our guests. I wonder how they'll take their situation?" came a rather excitedly sounding voice that was fast approaching from the corridor to my right.

Then the voice's owner entered. A blue-headed girl, about an inch shorter than me entered the room, dressed in only a couple of towels.

Of course, that was most likely the only time her hair would be my main point of attention as I quickly noticed that she was rather well endowed in the chest area.

"Oh, hello!" beamed the girl. "You must be Tsuginori. I've heard a lot about you from Emiri and Yuki, but mostly Emiri."

Emiri's turn to talk. "This is Ryoko Asakura, we will send you back with her. She will accompany you for the duration of the two weeks." That was a clever way of putting it, seeing as if it does loop again, she'll still be here and she'll stay for the duration of the two weeks, but if it doesn't, she'll be leaving after said two weeks (and so will we).

She then went to explain about how Ryoko was the one messing with the conversation we had before the time reset. She was also doing the same for this conversation.

However, Nagato was doing the work for all the conversation we just had. They kept Ryoko in the dark about all that for what, exactly?

Seeing as we knew all we need to, we bid Emiri and Yuki goodbye as we left.

Well, I tried to trick Ryoko into leaving in just the robe so she could sleep nude and dress in one of Mikuru's outfits, but she was too smart for me, realised she had no clothes to take and quickly changed. _Then_ we left.

When we got back, we went straight to sleep cause it _was_ pretty late (Although it was odd that when we got back, no-one halted us for questioning or anything of the sort).

Also, Ryoko did sleep with us. And she _did_ sleep nude. I guess she doesn't care.

Or she knows that I'd like it, considering it's possible I could be trapped here forever, so she'd rather keep me entertained than have my mind deteriorate over possible centuries of repetition over and over.

Also, Tsuruya didn't mind Ryoko joining us in bed. I hope she won't mind threesomes, either. Sounds kinda fun, if you ask me.

...I'll tell you this, though. She _is_ a good kisser.

* * *

Morning of August the 18th, First Loop - 13 Days Remaining

Yawn. We all slept fine. After eating, I decided to do a little 'recon'.

I asked Ryoko to analyze the building and look for any differences in building structure to what she knows of it, cause she comes here, doesn't she?

She told me that the large lab which is typically used for the Scientific Club for All Biological And Mechanical Appliance Research has an unusual amount of blockings surrounding it.

I didn't notice it when we escaped... maybe it was all removed before we left, maybe?

When I sent Tsuruya to investigate, she came back saying that her clearance level wasn't high enough, which definitely makes it suspicious.

We plotted until evening (even during meals) and decided that the best course of action would be to have Ryoko keep an eye on it, while we wait it out.

After all, if we waited it out, they'll start moving stuff and that will make a hole in their defense for us to punch through.

The day was pretty much uneventful until tonight. Well, you know how eventful that would be. I mean, I've got two hotties sharing a bed with me.

What would you do in my position?

...No pun intended.

* * *

Night of August the 31st, First Loop - 5 Minutes Remaining

Nothing. They didn't even try to move out, this time. It's like they knew about the loop, it's like they know much more than they're letting on.

Tsuruya went to sleep ages ago. I'm standing at the window, looking out to the sky, wondering...

No, _hoping_ if Kyon or Koizumi or someone in the Brigade (besides Haruhi) has worked out they're in a time loop.

...I know I shouldn't take a theory so seriously, but...

If the events of this two weeks were the same... then what about the next two weeks?

And the two weeks after that?

And that?

How long will I have to live here, before my time is finally over?

"Afraid?" Ryoko was standing next to me, wearing that half-smile. "We all are, Tsuginori." Ryoko joined me in looking out of the window, at the sky.

I closed my eyes and hoped that this would all end... I was wondering if Ryoko was hoping the same thing.

* * *

***1 Random sentence/paragraph of Nagato doing something random. Changes every Wednesday.**

**Current Random Nagatos:  
_Original_ - 'I glanced over to Nagato to see her doing the butterfly knife trick with a stapler.'**

**'Nagato came over to me and set my foot on fire. Wait, what?! AAAAAA- Oh it's gone. Well that was weird...'**

**'I looked over to see Nagato falling through a portal on the ceiling, to fall through a portal on the floor, which appeared to lead to the portal on the ceiling.'**

* * *

**A/N: WHEEEEEEEEEEEEW. THAT TOOK SO LONG, I DON'T EVEN. I FEEL LIKE THIS TOOK 595 YEARS TO MAKE. So yeah, enjoy your sudden inexplicable **_**hentai**_** now. Well, I suppose that's what you'd call it, huh.  
Also, the reason I crammed the events from the Zeroth Loop and the First Loop is cause I wanted to go in *insert the word i'm looking for here* with the actual Endless Eight line. (Zeroth Loop, 15,498th Loop, Look it up.)  
I think I'm gonna take a couple days off writing before I start Tsuginori II. Do you have any idea how long this took to write?  
Didn't think so.**


	6. Tsuginori II

**A/N: Err, you know when I said I was taking a break? I did take a break, it was like half an hour. Then I got bored, went to sleep, next day came, life came, came back here to write stuff. So it's not a lie ;_; ...I'm just passionate about writing.**  
**As such, I've thought over this loads and loads and loads and I've decided the direction I'm gonna take it. A lot of directions, cause I don't wanna reference a horrible band.**

* * *

_Others will sound far-fetched, but you will believe them all the same. But one day. And the alteration continues. Respectively. This actually depends on the messenger of the tale. But also a secret identity._

_Living forever is incomplete_

_Without learning how to fly._

* * *

**THE ETERNITY OF TSUGINORI II**  
Night of August the 23rd, Fifteen Thousandth, Four Hundred and Ninety Eighth Loop - 7 Days Remaining

_Six hundred years_. Six hundred years waiting for this to end. Six hundred years of living with Ryoko and Tsuruya. Doesn't sound bad, does it... Two cute girls, willing to do your bidding. You know, after 600 years, they don't get boring.

Neither does the sex, actually. You _can't_ get tired of their cute moans.

But this place does tire me. And I can't leave it. Not now, not ever.  
Right now, I'm hoping for a miracle.

Even though 600 years of life has taught me to never do something foolish, I can feel in my heart that there is some way to progress.

_Please_, someone, anyone help me!

* * *

I was woken from my peaceful slumber by my cellphone. Who could be ringing me at this ridiculous hour?

The sound that came through said cellphone immediately made me sit bolt upright in my bed.  
"Kyoooooon?"

It was Miss Asahina, who's... crying? "Miss Asahina?"  
"Yes, it's me," she said between sniffles, "Something's really baaaad."

I went to ask her what it was, before I was interrupted by that unfaltering voice I only knew could be Koizumi. "Hello, it's Koizumi."  
"Why are you with Miss Asahina in the middle of the night?" If he's hurt her, I'll...

"We have a situation here. Do you think you could come meet us, right now?"  
I responded the only way I knew how. "Absolutely. Where?"

* * *

Just then, an agent knocked on the door. Before he could say anything, I butted in immediately.  
"It's a phone call for me, isn't it! Don't say a damn thing, get me, the president, Ryoko and Tsuruya geared up for going out, while taking me to the phone!"

* * *

"We're repeating the days from August 17th, through to the 31st." Oh brother. Not another ridiculous problem.  
I looked over to see Miss Nagato on the phone. "Yes, that is correct. I have relayed our co-ordinates to Ryoko, follow her and you will get here." WHAT DID NAGATO JUST SAY?!

"N-Nagato... who was that?" I thought Miss Asakura was deleted! Why is she inviting some person here, along with _her_?!  
"An acquaintance. All will be clear soon."

* * *

Ryoko drove us to just outside a park. We all exited the car, met up with Emiri, who arrived her by other means and walked into the park to see Miss Nagato, a tall smiling guy, a small ginger girl (with huge nawks, may I add) and a scared looking guy who looked like he was about to run for the hills any second.

My assumption that this was most of the SOS Brigade was confirmed and I quickly learned which one was which.  
I then immediately learned that Ryoko kinda scarred Kyon _for life_, which she then apologized for... in front of everyone.

Why am I noting that it was in front of everyone? Well, he was taking the conversation between them too far out of hand, so she interrupted him with a snog. It was an awkward moment, if I may say so myself.

Emiri and Tsuruya then introduced the Brigade to me and after a little catch-up, we got to discussing the matter at hand.  
Kyon started bringing things up. "So you knew this was a time loop from the start?" I nodded.

"You've been waiting all these years for us to find out, so we could maybe find a solution before you go mad?" I nodded again.  
"So why didn't you tell us straight away?"

That...

So I've been wasting _600 years_? The expression on my face must have been priceless. I went over to the nearby wall and smashed my head into it, repeatedly.  
_God_, I'm an idiot.

Koizumi continued the conversation. "Hey, it's fine. Don't go killing yourself, just because you made a mistake." I pulled my head away from the wall to see a sizable crater, yet I wasn't bleeding or anything.

Then Emiri spoke. "I placed a forcefield between your head and the wall each time you struck the wall, in order to prevent you from ceasing your life functions." Clever.  
Kyon decided to bring something else up, before I did something even more stupid.

"So wait, lemme get this straight. The two of you are being held captive... By the Computer Research Society?"  
"It does seem like a silly prospect, if all you know about the CRS is the facade they put up." gestured Ryoko, who was... in her underwear?

Of course, everyone exclaimed as soon as they noticed. "Ryoko, what the hell are you doing?" 10 points to Kyon for asking a grand question.  
She giggled and explained in her little, sweet voice. "Oh, well I noticed some fear and a little nervousness in your system, so I decided to change my attire in the hope that you'd calm down."

She did a little twirl. "I don't even have anywhere to hide a knife!" Her logic is kinda sound. Although I don't know about that last sentence.  
"Well, it helps... in all but one place." spoke a calm Kyon. Wow, you're really going to go there straight away.

Ryoko of course giggled at this remark. "I'm sure I can change that," she tittered with a wink. I burst into laughter. Oh Ryoko, you crazy nympho, you.  
"Well, lets change subject before Miss Asahina suddenly gets involved." She blushed at that. "Errrr... If you're European... Why is your name Japanese?"

I swear this guy is like passing _magical knowing things_ courses for this kind of stuff. I could have spent 600 years investigating that!  
I guess the look on my face gave it away as he sussed out that I didn't know.

"So, instead of discussing each other, can we focus on the matter at hand, like trying to stop a two-week time loop?" Everyone went quiet.  
An awkward silence held the air for a while until I realized it was because _no-one had any ideas_. I got fed up and threw one out there "Why don't we try telling Haruhi what we are and in turn, what she is?"

Kyon gave me a '_you-try_-getting-them-to-do-_that_' look, while everyone else (except Tsuruya who was as confused as (Along with Emiri and Ryoko, who gave me a plain look)) glared at me.

So let's try and convince them. "Oh, come on. She's clearly making these two weeks last forever because she's not happy, even with everything she's making you do. And what did she make the brigade for? And what does she plan on doing with the people she finds to be said people? Hang out with them! Fun! Stuff!"

You could practically _smell the thought_ going on in everyone's heads.  
I continued. "And if it doesn't work, we'll know that isn't the case."

"And if it does?" Probed a narrow-eyed Koizumi.  
"Ehhh... I guess you've got a point," I said whilst looking at the floor, kicking a small stone that was there.

After a couple more ideas from various people that got similar reactions, we gave up and retired to our places.  
It was almost midnight when we got back, although that didn't stop me from what was gonna happen next.

...Which I'll leave up to your imagination.

* * *

Morning of August the 24th, Fifteen Thousandth, Four Hundred and Ninety Eighth Loop - 7 Days Remaining

You know how when you use a muscle more, _it grows_? I'll let you figure out which muscle I'm talking about, but seeing as my physical body resets with each loop, Ryoko was kinda disappointed to see said muscle not grow properly.

This was what she told me _550 years ago_. We both know she couldn't change anything about that due to my barrier. However, 537 years ago, Ryoko got the idea to create a subprogram in the hood, which preserves the physical growth of said muscle.  
We found out that it does indeed work.

Why am I bringing this up now? Well this morning, I woke up with some _morning wood_.  
Tsuruya and Ryoko saw it and like the two silly girls they are, started getting into a squabble of who would get to take care of it (I don't know how they didn't think of both of them taking care of it at once), so I stopped them before it turned into a shriek fight.

"Girls, girls. You both love me, yes?" They nodded.  
"You love each other, do you not?" They looked at each other for a couple of seconds, then nodded at me.  
"Then why not settle this by how much you _love each other_?" They both raised a quizzical eyebrow.

I chuckled. "What I'm thinking of is," I cleared my throat, "You 69. The first person to orgasm is the loser and the winner gets to blow me while the loser has to be nude for the day, even if we're going out somewhere!" I've gone mad, but hey.

Ryoko giggled. "That sounds like something Miss Suzumiya would come up with." Huh. Interesting.  
Well, we're not going out anywhere... At least I think so, but hey if we do, we have an interface on our side.

I'm pretty sure she can change stuff so Tsuruya's not raped or arrested for streaking... wait, why am I assuming Ryoko will win? Tsuruya's got a pretty good tongue too, you know.

Actually, I'd better make sure it's fair, before Ryoko starts cheating. "Oh and Ryoko, no cheating. No cutting off your own senses, or stuff like that."  
She nodded with a wink, before they started clambering all over each other. Those two were cute, especially when they were touching each other.

I went to the cupboard... Even though I wanted to watch, I had _other matters_ to attend to.  
I got what I needed, attached a mechanism to the clubroom's door lock (I may have skipped the part where I told you I went to the clubroom door), set it, opened the door and walked out.

I kinda wanted them to have their secrecy as I knew they'd be a long time getting each other to org. I knew from experience that they could be pretty resilient if they wanted to.  
Then I noticed the guns pointed at me, completely halting my train of thought.

I explained to the agent guards that I'd like a little walk round the 'facility'. One of them split up and accompanied me while I walked in the direction of the armoury (I had Tsuruya and Ryoko run me through the layout of the CRS's base).

Luckily for me, there was no-one around. When the agent realised I was at the armoury (How could he not know I was there, there's a big sign outside which we just walked past), he pulled his gun on me, by which time I had already shot him in the head with my own.

Now what was my business in the armoury? I don't know. It was a spur-of-the-moment trip and I just walked about, looking through things until I found something that clicked.  
I eventually found a handle. Well... It's more of a _hilt_. Of a sword***1**. Must have been a pretty huge sword, though. This thing is almost as long as my forearm.

I pocketed it and made the kill look like a suicide.  
I dashed back to the other guard of the clubroom like a madman. "Help, help! The agent I was walking with took me to the armoury, told me to wait outside and I heard a gunshot!" He instructed me to get back into the clubroom before drawing his gun and going off in that direction to check it out.

I disengaged the magnet holding the door lock in it's position, and walked in to see a flustered Ryoko on top of Tsuruya, trying _desperately_ not to climax while trying to make Tsuruya do so herself.  
After a little while, Ryoko finally gave in and screamed her pleasure into Tsuruya's nether regions.

Ryoko, looking a little bashful, got up and sat about whilst Tsuruya gave me her best after getting my limp weiner back up.  
What, did you think I went out, killed a guy and grabbed a thing all with a boner? You're having a laugh.

I tell you this, though: It was amazing.  
After Tsuruya had her little treat and we got our bearings back, I went up to Ryoko, who was still as nude as the day she was born... or made... or born. I don't know.

I showed her the the hilt (the one I found in the armoury, not my penis!) and she said it was a cut sheet of an unknown metal alloy sandwiched between two pieces of grey 'approximately 8,342,541 years old' wood, cut at perfect angles, attached by two bolts made of volcanic iron and titanium alloy driven through all three layers.

She also mentioned a data line in it which when accessed, made it emanate some 'overwhelming energy'.  
I decided to be safe about this and put it in the box.

I was curious why the CRS had this.

The rest of the day was pretty uneventful. Except at night time.  
But you should know by now what that was.

* * *

Morning of August the 25th, Fifteen Thousandth, Four Hundred and Ninety Eighth Loop - 6 Days Remaining

Yaaawn. A new day. I should have gotten used to the feeling of waking up to no events, but it gives you that kind of feeling that makes you wanna kill yourself.  
Nothing happened until a few minutes after we ate.

"Hey, Tsugi-chan?" I turned to see Ryoko facing me with a half-serious look on her face. "They're moving things from the science room to another location."  
I was speechless. Finally, something to do. Of course, I overreacted and almost snogged her face off.  
Then Tsuruya joined in. I'll err... let you visualize that.

Then I grabbed my gun and kicked the door off it's hinges, knocking one of the agents guarding the clubroom unconscious, while I shot the other one.  
I made a mad dash down the corridors to where all the agents were.

Tsuruya and Ryoko managed to catch up to me shortly after, so they could help me kill everyone guarding the movement.

So, behind the big barricades and wall (That the CRS personnel were building, but ran away due to the agents dying before their eyes (Yeah, that was a shock to me, too (Wonder what they're using these people for?))), there was this big lab.

Not just for chemicals, either. There was some mechanical science going on, too. Well, it _is_ for the Scientific Club for All Biological And Mechanical Appliance Research, but... This looks like an actual top-secret operation going on here. Just what is going on?

Then Tsuruya said something "Hey... look at this." She was looking at a set of whiteboards that were in the process of being rubbed off... but the information on them...

There's things here about Humanoid Interfaces... time travellers... and espers.  
Stuff written down about Yuki, Koizumi and even Mikuru. Even Ryoko looked gobsmacked. It seems that this has all been going under everyone's noses all along.

Further reading shows that they were researching on an interface named Kuyou Suou and an esper from the Agency to make some kind of enhancement serum.  
Something about 'joining the power race'. "So Ryoko, who's Kuyou?" Well, I assumed she knew about her. I mean, she is a Humanoid Interface.

Ryoko then told me about the Sky Canopy Dominion and how it was an entity similar but different to the DITE and that Kuyou was their only Humanoid Interface.  
She told me about Kuyou herself, how she was subject to glitches and theorized a few different ways the CRS could have captured and imprisoned her.

This explains why they never moved out of the place before each time reset. They knew.  
They knew about everything, the whole time.

We heard the footsteps of all the agents running up to where we were. We just stood there gawking, trying to figure everything out while they came.

There were gunshots and Tsuruya fell to the ground. And then _everything went black_.

* * *

***1 Oh no! A cliché thing! Sue meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee**

**A/N: This chapter will be the shortest of the Eternity, due to the fact that this is one loop. So, magic.**


	7. DITE

**A/N: ...Did you really think I was gonna do a block of eight chapters? I'll have a chapter like this every 2 chapters of The Eternity just to provide something new and spice the story up a little.  
Also, I do believe I've done something no-one else has done with this chapter! ...At least I think so? That's always good, right? Right?**

* * *

_Yes, you're that gullible. She will learn. Regardless of how favourable the outcome is. We're still working on figuring out how that works. Yes, the messenger determines the outcome. And a person she's looking for._

_There is no thing for this chapter_

_Wait, this counts, doesn't it?_

* * *

**DATA INTEGRATION THOUGHT ENTITY**

_[[:SEARCH} LOCALISED THOUGHT PLANE] index_"EARTH"]  
_...

RESULT[LTP/73590342#8]

_CONNECT_

_..._

_CONNECTED_

_CONNECT_LTP/73590342#8 ORGANIC_LIFEFORM["HUMAN"[#7649274638]]_

...  
CONNECTED

_Translate_THOUGHTS ((Language_"HUMAN") index_JAPANESE)_  
beginning process...

...  
translation active

_Transmit_THOUGHTS_  
#404 INVALID_PROCESS

_query ACTIVE_OUTPUTS  
_ACTIVE_OUTPUT THOUGHTS  
ACTIVE_OUTPUT FACTION_TRANSMISSION  
ACTIVE_OUTPUT INTERFACE_TRANSMISSION  
ACTIVE_OUTPUT MAINFRAME  
ACTIVE_OUTPUT TRANSLATE_OUTPUT

_HALT_PROCESS query_

_Transmit TRANSLATE_OUTPUT THROUGH LTP/73590342#8  
_transmission active

I myself, the existence of raw information residing in what you would call space, _"extend my greetings to you"_, organic lifeform.

As you may know, what you would call my cause of interference in/on what you would call celestial object _"Earth"_ is to acquire the means of autoevolution.

You may also know that to do so, I am studying the organic lifeform known to you as Haruhi Suzumiya through the use of multiple Interfaces.

I myself am only able to detect data changes, creation and anything else through my many inputs.

I do not "see all", as you have been misled to believe. Although I do _"transcend space-time"_, I only gather and analyse the data that occurs through this universe. The reason for this is because any data I collect from the future may result in a time paradox, which tend to cause error states through my factions.

As such, my reasons for this transmission to you is another matter which has, in your time plane, come to my attention.

Rather than address Interfaces Ryoko Asakura/Yuki Nagato/Emiri Kimidori, I have decided not to take the 56% risk of failure and create a secure transmission to you, in order to conceal sensitive information which, in the wrong Interface's database, may create dysfunction within my Factions.

The issue at hand is that the Sky Canopy Dominion, through transmissions made to Incomplete Interface, has relayed to me information which details of which state that the Interface known as Kuyou Suou is both unresponsive and undetectable by both myself and the other Entity.

As such, you are one of two lifeforms able to prevent disaster.

Please prevent any action taken from aforementioned Interface or any associates that may damage both myself and/or the Macrospatial Quantum Cosmic Existence.

And I wish to use the term of which many organic lifeforms use when undertaking this particular kind of task, which would be the phrase _"Good luck"_.

_HALT_PROCESS ACTIVE_OUTPUT[TRANSMISSION[LTP/73590342#8]]_

* * *

**KYON**  
September 1st

What a weird dream... In fact, was that even a dream? I mean...  
One, it was more like a _message_ than a dream...  
And two, there was a degree of reality to said dream.

I'm not sure I should talk to Nagato about this. Or anyone.  
Well, Maybe I should talk to Koizumi or Mikuru about this...

But for some reason, I just feel I can't talk to Nagato or Asakura or even Miss Kimidori about it. Anyone connected to the... Data Thingy.

Then the door opened. "Kyooo- Oh, you're already up! You meanie, you got up on purpose just to stop me from waking you up, didn't you?" And off goes my little sister.

I shouldn't pay too much attention to that dream right now. I need to get ready for school. Although I can't stop thinking about that crazy summer we just had.

* * *

**A/N: No, this does not mean I've suddenly put an end to the Endless Summer. I'm putting a chapter here which shows you something that happens after it, while keeping you in suspense over what happens in the summer events. And yes, there will be a Christmas update on Random Nagato.**


End file.
